you snooki!

Protip: Don't look up "You Slut!" on Google Images without safesearch on. Don't type it in on MediaFire either; one of the results that pop up is "Post-Abortion Slut Fuck", a phrase that, unfortunately, has been engraved in my mind. And I thought I masturbated to some weird shit...

ANYWAYS, You Slut! is a math-rock band hailing from the land of Queen Elizabeth (whom, incidentally, is also a slut.) They debuted in 2006 with a six song EP, but their first LP, Critical Meat, was released in 2008. Interestingly, Critical Meat was released in Japan in 2007, and 2008 in the UK. So what about the album itself? Pretty god-damn impressive. The opening track has some of the greatest cowbell playing this side of Electioneering has seen. The beats are choppy, and snares are applied sparingly (yet effectively). What kind of guitar-wizardry do all eight tracks use? I don't know, but I'm afraid to question it. To quote fellow wigger and douchebag Shaggy 2 Dope: "This shit'll blow your motherfuckin' mind!!!"

RESPOND TO MY LETTERS COMCAST

>Implying I'm not playing Phoenix Wright

If you're wondering why I just typed that, it's because I have to keep up my gamer-cred.

Want to hear a joke?

WATER TEMPLE SUCKS!

XD!!!11!1

Midnite Vultures was pretty good, Mutations was slightly below average, Sea Change was OK, Guero was slightly above average (having said that, the Hell Yes EP was fucking awesome), and The Information was extremely unremarkable. The standards Odelay set were very harsh, and to be honest, I wasn't expecting much from Modern Guilt. Naturally, I was pleasently surprised when it turned out to be fucking amazing. Beck had some help from Danger Mouse in production, which might explain why even the 2deep4u tracks are toe-tappers. It's very chill. It's not serious like Sea Change, but it's not goofy like Guero. Best Beck album of the naughts? No contest.

i think ur a toxic event

You know that feeling your hand gets when you dip it in ice-water for a long time? Like, it sort of makes your skin feel like it's too tight for your fingers? That's what my thumb feels like right now, but with blisters. Thanks Nintendo 64. Thanks.

Now, here's something I haven't thought about in a while. The Airborne Toxic Event is a Los Angeles band that could have been the "next big thing" (that's what my brother thinks, anyway.) Maybe so, but the 1.6 rating Pitchfork gave their debut self-titled album says otherwise. Well, they can suck it. Sure, not all of the tracks are as deep as, say, Hospice, but sometimes you don't want to ponder the emotions of the boyfriend of a cancer-stricken girl, or Rivers Cuomo's Asian fetish. Does This Mean You're Moving On? is a two-minute, upbeat song about some bitch who ignores her boyfriend, and all the while he finds proof that she's cheating. Like I said before, it's not Neutral Milk Hotel or whatever, but it's worth a listen.

Best Tracks:

Wishing Well, Does This Mean You're Moving On?, Papillon, Missy

guess i'm doing fine

Everything about Distortion screams 80's. The hot-pink cover, the female/male vocals, the swirling guitars, etc., etc. This is the second album in a series of albums Fields frontman Stephin Merritt calls the "no-synth" trilogy (the first being i and the third being Realism, out on the 26th). It's a strange concept, considering that one of the things that make the Magnetic Fields so good is the synth. They make up for it with the heavily distorted (hence the name?) guitar and bass sounds. It's great. Download it.

You know what you're getting into by the first track. The album as a whole sends you down a ramp in roller-skates while in a sugar coma from drinking too much TAB. Also, to a lesser extent, AIDS. I mean that in the most positive way possible.

One of my recent favourites

Algernon Cadwallader - Some Kind Of Cadwallader
Link

With many comparing Algernon Cadwallader to the brilliant Cap'n Jazz there's no way you can be disappointed, great energetic band. For fans of Cap'n Jazz, Snowing, The Get Up Kids. Best tracks: The Stars, Katie's Conscious, Motivational Song